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[DISCLAIMER: For all pastors and church leaders who read this post and watch the video, please do not fear. I promise not to scare your kids when I come to your city.]
I’m doing something new. At least, I’m trying to. As usual, I’m struggling with letting go of what everyone else might think. That habit is hard to break!
If you’re a close friend of mine, you know that it’s a dream of mine to raise the bar on quality and excellence, and to do so in multiple arenas. Magic has a tendency to be incredibly low quality, or just flat out cheesy. The industry is way behind in comparison to other art forms. The same is true for the church. And while I feel like times are slowly changing, Christians in general seem to care very little about art or creativity. I’m a Christian, and a magician. It’s definitely an up-hill battle.
I’m sure that it’s natural for even some of you reading this right now to think, “That’s unfair, and not true at all.” Yet a good majority of people who claim they truly value artistic expressions of creativity, usually just lack awareness. I don’t care if you think what you do is cool and creative…what does the rest of the world think? Especially the people who don’t already come to your church. (But that’s a whole other discussion. Plus, who am I to blame? I haven’t exactly been the epitome of creativity.)
So here’s the deal. I’m doing this:
It’s a new live experience, unlike anything I’ve ever put together before. (And I can’t take full credit. There’s been tons of collaboration.) Some people love it. Some people think it’s creepy. Bottom line: It’s going to be AMAZING. But I have a confession to make:
It scares me to death, and I’m being paralyzed by fear.
See, the reality is, as cool as you thought that video might have been, the concept is probably going to fail for a little while. And that’s when I get scared. Allow me to explain…
Ever since I was 11 years old, I’ve been performing in nice, safe, easy to schedule environments – Upward Awards Nights, VBS Family Programs, Disciple Now Weekends, you name it. These events are awesome for me. I have the opportunity to use the talents God has given me, and use them to share my faith with a lot of really cool people. But what if??
What if my vision were to do something bigger, in addition to what I’m already doing? What if there was a part of my vision that would never be fulfilled? What if instead of performing on maroon carpeted stages and begging people to come watch and listen, I went to the places they’re already used to going for quality art and entertainment? And what if I then created an artistic and creative experience that not only rivals the quality of any Vegas production, but contained life-changing content that passed through the clutter?
Don’t get me wrong, I don’t want to completely stop doing the types of events I just mentioned. I love being a part of them, and desire to continue. But what if I could be even more effective by doing more? And even if I could, would the church even support me?
I don’t know what you would guess, but I already have the answer: It’s “No.” (At least, not yet.)
In the last few months, we’ve had a team of 8 people spreading the word about what we’re up to, having direct conversations about what we’re doing to pastors, promoters, Christian radio stations, etc. And these are all people who know who I am, who have seen what I do live, in person, and said they loved it. This has been the response from 95% of those people:
“It’s just too different, and we don’t want to take that kind of risk.”
“It doesn’t really fit our needs, but we would like to book you for our Upward Basketball Awards Night. The show will be in our gym, and the kids will sit on the floor.”
“We don’t really want to host an event at a theater, because we’d rather have it in our church building.”
“We think you’re great, but you haven’t had any songs on the radio, and therefore people don’t know who you are and may not come.” (I’m not kidding.
“No one has ever done anything like this before, and therefore there’s no track record.”
And that’s where fear comes in. The reality of my situation is, it’s by doing what I’ve always done that pays my mortgage each month and puts food on my table. So, I’ll be transparent with you. I went to bed last night thinking, “I need to be really careful about how many people I show this new video to, because a lot of the people who ‘pay my mortgage’ will be scared away, and if I’m not careful, I’ll lose some bookings.” I fell asleep with that fear on my mind.
When I started my day today, I randomly clicked over to Craig GroescheI’s blog, which I check from time to time, and the first thing I read was a post titled, “The Temptations of Success”. Here’s an excerpt:
Another temptation of success is to “keep doing what you’ve been doing.” Maybe God blessed your “seeker style ministry”… or your “small group outreaches”… or your “youth pizza, couples skating, lock-in parties.” Just because God blessed something you did last year doesn’t mean that’s what He wants you to do this year.
The longer we do ministry, the harder it is to be open to change. And the more success we’ve had recently, the more we’re tempted to trust the model… instead of the Giver of the model.
I could easily keep doing what I’ve been doing. Doing something creative, new, and different obviously scares people. I already have a successful ‘model’, and it’s easy to just trust it. It’s safe. It’s comfortable. It pays the bills. And God uses it. The problem is, I have a God given dream with some God given potential. And it requires change. The type of change that requires risk. And it’s the type of risk that might scare a few people away.
Is that a risk I take? To be perfectly honest, I’d almost rather not. But I’m not sure I’d ever be satisfied if I didn’t. After all, it is my Sens de Vie…
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: authenticity, bj harris, christian illusionist, divorce, grace, illusionist, transparency
As most of you know, Katie and I just returned from spending two weeks in China. (I actually have a good excuse for going two weeks without writing this time.)
While there is much I learned while experiencing Chinese culture, (like the fact that there are 1.2 Billion people who have never been told the truth), one of the most significant things that fascinated me was the acceptance of shallow relationships. What’s ironic is why their relationships are so shallow. It’s called “Saving Face.”
To “save face” means that you share nothing about yourself that would show weakness. That means that transparency is frowned upon. For example, someone from China could have had the worse disagreement and argument with their spouse that they’ve ever had, but the moment that person is in public, a smile is plastered on their face. Does any of this sound familiar?
They’re also obsessed with prosperity. That means that if you have lunch or dinner with someone in a restaurant, but don’t have any money, you still pay. In China, it’s incredibly difficult to get someone to allow you to buy their food. Everyone wants to be prosperous, and even if they aren’t, they want to appear that way. Anything sound familiar now?
Please don’t get me wrong. The Chinese people make up one of the most beautiful cultures that I’ve ever experienced. They’re kind, respectful, and giving. And I fell in love with the idea of serving them. But transparency? That’s not allowed.
Losing face is against the rules.
The question is, what are the rules? And where did they come from? No one ever created a law in China that said “Thou Shalt Not Lose Face by Showing Thy True Self.” Yet for some reason, authenticity is not acceptable in their culture.
In America, no one ever said, “If you have issues, hide them. If you have debt, don’t tell anyone. Oh, and regardless of what your income or social status is, make sure you drive the car, wear the right clothes, and live in the right neighborhood.”
To be honest, I’m sick of trying to “save face.” Sure, we don’t call it that in American culture, but it’s the same thing. And it’s time to get real. Actually, this all reminds of the story that got me thinking about this whole authenticity issue to begin with.
Last fall, a very close friend of mine, (who is in full-time ministry), called me to let me know two things:
1. He’s leaving the country for a few weeks to do some missions work.
2. He’s divorcing his wife.
Is it just me, or does something about that picture not seem right? Granted, he was being authentic in the midst of the conversation. In fact, he was being more transparent than I have ever experienced him to be. But getting there was a journey, and unfortunately, parts of the journey could have been avoided.
Apparently, the problems in his marriage weren’t new. Which didn’t make sense to me. I used to go to their house for dinner at least once a week, and they seemed like they belonged on a poster for the American Christian Family. Their kids were polite and respectful. They worked together, took family vacations, and had dinner together every evening around the same table. Most nights they even studied the Bible. Their kids were even home-schooled, and with the exception of the Andy Griffith Show, they watched no media unless it was “faith-based” television, movies, or books. (This is all a whole other discussion…)
So what happened? Well, that’s a question I can’t answer. But I do know why the issue(s) were never resolved. And they had plenty of time to resolve them. Apparently, they’ve been fighting ever since the their kids were born, and he and his wife haven’t slept in the same bed in years.
While we were talking, I asked a simple question: “Why didn’t you talk to someone?” His answer is something I’ll probably carry with me for the rest of my life…
“BJ, I couldn’t talk to anyone. Who was I going to talk to? I’m in ministry. If I told someone the truth about the state of my marriage, I’d be judged, because I’m held to a higher standard.”
Wow. Well, it isn’t a secret anymore. But as much as I’d like to, I can’t judge him. And not because he’s my friend, but because I’ve been telling lies for 24 years myself…about a lot of different things. And if you don’t think you have, then you’re lying to yourself. But the better discussion is, “Why?”
Why can we not be real with the people around us when things are hard? Why can we not ask for help because we’re in fear of being judged? Is it only the fault of those who don’t ask? Or have we created a society where people are judged, only to turn around and be greeted by hypocrisy? After all, why risk? Sometimes I don’t blame people. Why not just “save face”?
What if, instead, we created safe places where people could be real with each other? And what if those in leadership were real with the people they lead? If authenticity breeds authenticity, (and I believe it does), then maybe folks like my friend wouldn’t feel the pressure to show up in public, every day of his life, force another fake smile across his face and pretend to have it all together. Because let’s face it…”faking it” destroyed his family and everyone got hurt.
The reality is, none of us really have it all together. Let’s be honest about the true mess we all find ourselves in, embrace the pain and suffering, allow it to belong, and get through it. Only through true community, authentic relationships, and God’s radical grace expressed through His followers, will that ever be possible.
I’m sure a lot of you are wondering when I’m going to put this whole “authenticity” thing to rest. The truth is, probably never. It’s now become a life-long pursuit. I’ve experienced the true freedom to be who I was created to be, and I’ve experienced genuine community in the way true relationship was designed to be. No more lies. No more painting pictures. And no more trying to shape, manage, and control the perceptions of other people. I’m now an honest human being, despite what others might think. It’s only way to survive in a world filled with lies.
No more saving face.
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There were about 30 men in the circle. I was already getting nervous…yet somehow excited at the same time. One by one, each guy began to state why he was there in 1-2 sentences. It was almost my turn. The man next to me said, “I’m here because I’m f***** up, and I feel like there are other men here who are f***** up with me.” He talked for maybe 15 more seconds. I wanted him to talk longer. Because I was next.
“I’m BJ,” I said. “Hi BJ,” the group responded. My knees were shaking. “Um…I’m here because I’m a professional Christian…and…uh…a professional liar. I’m having a hard time learning how to be real. I’m a friend of Nate’s, and I’m here because I heard this might be a place that I could learn to be who I really am, in an effort to become who I want to be.” The entire group responded again. “Thanks, BJ.”
I know what it sounds like – sitting in a circle, stating your name, acknowledging each other – but I promise, I’m not a drunk. In fact, other than the sip of wine my wife talked me into tasting while in Napa Valley, no form of alcohol has ever touched my tongue. This is not because I’m legalistic or judgmental. It’s for two reasons:
1. That first sip of wine set my throat on fire. (Feel free to join my wife in making fun…I can handle it, I promise. She loves to tell the story.)
2. I tend to be a creature of habit. If I find out that I like something, I tend to develop obsessions.
But now I’m on a rabbit trail. Back to the point…
This was not an AA meeting, though frankly, I’m at a point in my life where if I were at an AA meeting, I’d have no problem admitting it. I told you I was feeling freedom, and I meant it.
The meeting was the weekly gathering of a group called, “The Samson Society.” It’s existed for a few years now, and was started by my friend, Nate Larkin. He wrote a book a few years back titled, Samson and the Pirate Monks. I won’t spoil the book for you, but he has an incredible story and you need to read it.
As I sat in the meeting, I listened to Christian men be transparent about their lives and struggles. One guy is addicted to porn. One guy is addicted to debt. One guy is married with kids, but struggles with homosexuality. One guy hates people, and is learning how to relate to them.
One by one they authentically shared their lives with each other. And one by one they experienced freedom. And as it happened, no one shared advice. No shared scripture. And most importantly, no one judged. There is most definitely a time and place for advice and God’s word, but this wasn’t the time.
You see, this isn’t normal. People, especially men, don’t share their junk. I mean, why would they? Most of the time, it only leads to condemnation. But in this safe place, they could be real. Transparent. Authentic. And free.
After the meeting, we went to the local pub. (Ironically owned by a couple of Christians.) While there, I experienced community in a way I’d never experienced it before. I was surrounded by more language and alcohol than I’d ever been surrounded by in my entire life. (Then again, I’ve led a pretty sheltered life for the past 24 years.) Yet I was unable to escape a simple fact: I felt like these men were closer to the heart of God than any other men I’ve spent time with.
They are living in true community with each other, with eyes focused on Jesus, and the brotherhood they’ve created is an unstoppable force to be reckoned with. True community might just be impossible without authenticity, and a whole lot of radical grace.
Is “transparency” a buzz word? Has “authenticity” become a fad in the church? Probably. More than one of you have responded with that opinion, and to be honest, I’d have to agree. But do your best to not write off the entire church with one huge stroke. Because in some places in the world, it’s happening, and it’s changing lives.
Including mine.
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: authenticity, bj harris, christian illusionist, illusionist, illusions, transparency
Most people don’t realize it, but my life tends to mirror my vocation. I live an illusion.
A couple of months ago, I was meeting with a friend/marketing consultant regarding blogs/social networking sites/web 2.0 stuff. I was explaining my struggle with the new form of “content-driven” marketing rooted in transparency, because in the past, my view of marketing has always been that it’s a “battle of perceptions.”
The goal has always been to create the perception of what I want to be – busy, in-demand, professional, respected, etc. So, all of my marketing and advertising contributes to the perception that I am those things, so that I can become those things. After all, don’t people want to hire people who are in-demand already?
The problem is, that mentality penetrated my personal life. (Should they ever be separated?) I’ve spent my entire life managing relationships and creating illusions. I’ve done everything in my power to create perceptions in other people’s minds of how I want them to view me.
I wanted people to think I’m successful, so I bought a big house I shouldn’t have. Then I wanted people to think I was humble, so I sold that one and bought a small one. Then I went on to tell people the story of how I bought a big house, then sold it to move into a smaller one. “Look how humble I am…”
The bottom line is that it’s all I’ve ever done. The result has been shallow relationships, and a life filled with a lack of genuine character. I know, it was stupid. And the plan totally back fired.
A few weeks ago, my pastor had a panel discussion on suffering. Someone didn’t show up, so just before the service he told me I was going to be on the panel. I said, “No thanks.” He said, “You don’t have a choice.”
My first thought was, “Crap. If I knew I was going to be on stage, I would’ve worn cooler clothes.” Obviously, it’s still a constant struggle for me, and will be for a long time. But I’m slowly learning because I can taste freedom. I’ve been tasting it for 6 months now, and I’ve never experienced quite like I have in the past couple of days. (More later…)
We must create safe places, especially in the church, where people from all walks of life can be authentic and transparent. And it has to start at leadership, because authenticity breeds authenticity.
Only through our authentic admittance of pain and suffering, can true healing begin to occur. It will change the face the christianity, and therefore the face of Jesus.
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: bj harris, chris byers, christian illusionist, illusionist, magician, my life of illusion, premiere speakers bureau, variety road show
Okay, I’ll be the first one to admit that I’m not so good at this blogging thing. I’m surrounded by a lot of people who continually tell me that I should be blogging more often. I also hear regularly from people telling me that they miss not hearing what’s going on with me. But it’s hard…it’s really, really hard. I’m just so insanely busy.
Will I ever be successful at posting regularly? Probably not. I’d like to be, and I think I could be. Eventually. But for now, I have too much on my plate. And that’s okay since there are a gazillion other blogs for people to read. I don’t think my lack of time to write is hindering anyone’s progress in life.
However, I am genuinely thankful for those of you who want to know what’s going on. I do not take you people for granted. So, here’s the latest news about what’s going on, displayed in the most efficient way possible. I promise that in the coming days and weeks, I’ll be sharing much more about each of these items…
1. I hired a guy named, Chris Byers, to be my “right-hand man.” He’s taking over all of my booking, road management, and day to day management tasks “in-house.” He’s been amazing!
2. We’re getting ready to begin releasing our online video series titled, “My Life of Illusion.” The first few episodes include everything from me doing magic for music artists at GMA week in Nashville, to international footage from Brazil. Stay tuned for details.
3. Katie and I leave for an East Asia tour in 2 weeks, and will be gone until June.
4. We’ve been working non-stop on our Fall tour this year, “The Magical Variety Road Show!” We will be hosting a talent contest in each city, and there is already some buzz going around about some of the creativity involved in the tour. Check out a short video trailer here.
That’s it for now. Talk to you soon…
BJ
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: bj harris, boiler room theater, franklin, franklin events, illusionist, magic show, nashville entertainment, nashville events, the factory in franklin, tn, williamson county events
Writing about how busy I’ve been seems to be a popular topic lately. Katie and I have spent the last two months touring non-stop. We’ve literally been from coast to coast…from San Francisco, CA to Wilmington, NC. This past weekend we were in Marquette, MI, which is located in the Upper Peninsula, just south of the Canadian line. It’s so nice to be home!
I’m well aware that a lot of people don’t care, but for those of you who do check my blog regularly and have wondered where I’ve been, I apologize. I’m still learning how to keep up with everything. The good news is, I just hired someone full-time, which will take a lot of things off my plate, as well as free me up to be more creative…something I’ve been wanting for a long, long time. But more on that later…
For those of you who live in the Nashville area, we are doing 4 performances this weekend at The Boiler Room Theater, which is Williamson County’s only professional theater! It’s an intimate, 100 seat theater located at The Factory, close to downtown Franklin. The shows are this Friday and Saturday, at 7:00 & 9:30 pm on both nights. Tickets are available through the Boiler Room website.
We decided to do these events for two reasons. One, because everyone always asks us when we’re going to do something local. And two, because Katie and I are taking May off to go serve in East Asia. Due to not doing shows here in the States next month, we’ll have a slight loss in income. This weekend’s shows are our effort to make up for that. So if you’re interested at all in coming out to one of the shows, be sure to invite as many friends as possible! Know that all of the ticket sales are going towards our ability to go serve people in Asia, who simply can’t afford to pay us to come.
It’s always a joy to serve overseas, not to mention the way that it changes/refreshes our perspective. I’m sure I’ll be sharing more about the trip in the coming weeks. It’ll be here before we know it!
In the mean time, order some tickets for the Boiler Room show in Franklin this weekend, and invite some friends! We need your help in spreading the word! Your support is really, really appreciated!!
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I am still alive. And I have much to share…soon, very soon.
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: bj harris, christian illusionist, david loy, duane ward, illusionist, jeremy breland, micheal smallbone, premiere speakers bureau, shawn hanks, taylor brooks
After 21 straight days on the road, it feels GREAT to be home. And the weather couldn’t be more beautiful in Nashville!
We’re home for exactly one week, and then we fly to San Francisco for three days, and immediately head to Kentucky, Arkansas, and then the upper-peninsula of Michigan. I only wish that this week at home could be more relaxing. There’s just so much to be done in the short amount of time we’re here!
It does help that I have a great team of people surrounding me. I just wouldn’t make it without my amazing wife, Katie. We’re soon going to be adding to our team, but before I talk about that, (check back in the next few days), you have to check out what the guys at my agency did this week. This is why working with the people at Premiere is so much fun…enjoy!
Here’s a $500 bet from Taylor, gone hilariously wrong, after David surprised him by accepting his offer…
Filed under: Uncategorized | Tags: bj harris, boise id, caribou coffee, christian illusionist, hot dogs, ikea, illusionist, southgate mi, tim hortons, wayne mi
It’s been a busy few days. Last Saturday we had two events in two different parts of Detroit. At 12:00 noon, we were in Wayne, MI, then Southgate, MI at 7:00 pm. Both shows were a blast!
As crazy as the day was, we did manage to swing by Ikea in-between shows and get my usual $0.50 hot dog. They’re simply amazing, and the fact they’re only $0.50 makes them taste that much better.
We actually found the Ikea by accident, while looking for a Caribou Coffee, (Katie’s favorite coffee shop…she’s a little obsessed.) I offered to stop by a Tim Horton’s for her, but the last time she drank their coffee she had the shakes for a week. Apparently, their Canadian locations put Nicotine in their coffee, but that’s an unverifiable rumor.
On Sunday, we left Detroit to fly to Boise, ID. Our first flight was into Salt Lake City, UT, and it was delayed an hour and a half, causing us to miss our connecting flight. We finally got another flight out, and got into Boise around 12:30 am Mountain Time. I’ve never flown to a show and had everything go as planned. (And my agent wonders why I’m always willing to drive for thousands of miles to get to a show.)
The good news is, our luggage actually made it through all of the flight changes, and arrived in Boise with us. I guess there’s a first time for everything…
Today, Monday, we had two shows in Boise. One at 6:00 and one at 8:00. The shows went very well, and were even more than than usual. The room was packed with about 800 people, and there was standing room only. Tomorrow, we have one more show, and then fly back to Detroit on Wednesday morning at 7:00 am.
As usual, we have lots of footage from both our travels, and of the audience. If you were there, be sure to check back often. We’re getting really close to the release of the first episode online, and you do not want to miss it!
I’ll talk to you about that very, very soon…
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After briefly complaining about paying over $4.00 for diesel yesterday, I received an email about how to save some money at the pump. I found the information very interesting, and thought you might enjoy it…
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My line of work is in petroleum for about 31 years now, so here are some tricks to get more of your money’s worth for every gallon. Here at the Kinder Morgan Pipeline where I work in San Jose, CA, we deliver about 4 million gallons in a 24-hour period thru the pipeline. One day is diesel, the next day is jet fuel, and gasoline, regular and premium grades. We have 34-storage tanks here with a total capacity of 16,800,000 gallons.
Only buy or fill up your car or truck in the early morning when the ground temperature is still cold. Remember that all service stations have their storage tanks buried below ground. The colder the ground, the more dense the gasoline, when it gets warmer gasoline expands, so buying in the afternoon or in the evening, your gallon is not exactly a gallon. In the petroleum business, the specific temperature of the fuel plays an important role.
A 1-degree rise in temperature is a big deal for this business. But the service stations do not have temperature compnsation at the pumps.
When you’re filling up, do not squeeze the trigger of the nozzle to a fast mode. If you look you will see that the trigger has three stages: low, middle, and high. In slow mode you should be pumping on low speed, thereby minimizing the vapors that are created while you are pumping. All hoses at the pump have vapor return. If you are pumping on the fast rate, some other liquid that goes to your tank becomes vapor. Those vapors are being sucked up and back in to the underground storgage tank so your’e getting less worth for you money.
One of the most important tips is to fill up when your gas tank is half full or half empty. The reason for this is, the more gas you have in your tank, the less air occupying its empty space. Gasoline evaporates faster than you can imagine. Gasoline storage tanks have an internal floating roof. This roof serves as zero clearance between the gas and the atmosphere, so it minimizes the evaporation. Unlike service stations, here where I work, every truck that we load is temperature compensated so that every gallon is actually the exact amount.
Another reminder, if there is a gasoline truck pumping into the storage tanks when you stop to buy gas, DO NOT fill up. Most likely the gasoline is being stirred up as the gas is being delivered, and you might pick up some of the dirt that normally settles on the bottom.
Hope this will help you get more value for your money!
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Well, there you go. I can’t verify any of this information, because I’m not an expert on fuel, but it all makes sense to me. Hope it helps!
In addition to the information above, the email also included the following important notice…
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WHERE TO BUY USA GAS, THIS IS VERY IMPORTANT TO KNOW.
Gas rationing in the 80’s worked even though we grumbled about it. It might even be good for us! The Saudis are boycotting American goods. We should return the favor. An interesting thought is to boycott their GAS. Every time you fill up the car, you can avoid putting more money into the coffers of Saudi Arabia. Just buy from gas companies that don’t import their oil from the Saudis. Nothing is more frustrating than the feeling that every time I fill-up the tank, I am sending my money to people who are trying to kill me, my family, and my friends.
I thought it might be interesting for you to know which oil companies are the best to buy gas from and which major companies import Middle Eastern oil.
These companies import Middle Eastern oil:
Shell……………………… 205,742,000 barrels
Chevron/Texaco……… 144,332,000 barrels
Exxon /Mobil…………… 130,082,000 barrels
Marathon/Speedway… 117,740,000 barrels
Amoco……………………….62,231,000 barrels
Citgo gas is from South America, from a Dictator who hates Americans. If you do the math at $30/barrel, these imports amount to over $18 BILLION! (oil is now $90 – $100 a barrel)
Here are some large companies that do not import Middle Eastern oil:
Sunoco………………0 barrels
Conoco………………0 barrels
Sinclair……………..0 barrels
BP/Phillips…………0 barrels
Hess…………………..0 barrels
ARCO………………..0 barrels
If you go to Sunoco.com, you will get a list of the station locations near you.
All of this information is available from the Department of Energy and each is required to state where they get their oil and how much they are importing.
But to have an impact, we need to reach literally millions of gas buyers. Please share this information with everyone you know.
